Tuesday 18 February 2014

Last year ... today....

Less than a week to the little bumling's first birthday.... A year old!!! 

Oh my god where did this year go?!!

Exactly a year ago today I was going nuts! I knew my date was around the corner... I could feel him kicking around and rolling around nice and good... My tummy was (still is!!) a nice round football!!! 

I was a mad mix of excitement and nerves... I so badly wanted to see him... See what he looked like!  Hold his tiny little body in my arms... Kiss his little cheeks.... Smell his adorable baby smell.... 

But at the same time, I was so scared of his tiny size... I was so worried what kind of a mum I would be... If I would be able to keep him happy and safe... 

I'm sure all new mums are apprehensive about finally meeting the baby.... The bond that they have built in those nine months... You're not sure how it will be once the little one is out with you....

I remember since I was having a c section... I had the choice of getting an epidural and being able to watch the baby come out... So initially I was all rock star about it... But once I was on that operation table... I freaked the hell out!!!!! And begged my doc to knock me out completly....  I was ok not being the first to see him!!! 

By the time they got him to my room... I was going crazy to see him... Everyone else had already seen him... Oh god... It's the most indescribable feeling... When they bring in that tiny little thing wrapped up in fabric with his chotu face and scrunched up eyes... 

It took all of me not to squeeze him with the amount of love I felt for him in those few seconds!!!! 

He was everything I knew he would be.... Super duper adorable and madly lovable!!! Ha ha ha!!! 

No but seriously... Just seeing him... I felt this crazy immense burst of love inside me... I really felt like I couldn't contain it... The happiness of seeing that tiny thing which is all yours... He's literally a part of you... It's mind blowing... 

Now I knew what he looked like... What kind of hair he had... What kind of eyes... I could feel his tiny heart beat when he would sleep on me... It was real..

I had a son..

And here I am today with this little boy... No more an infant no more a newborn... He is now a toddler... !! No more does he stay wrapped in fabric still on a bed.. Nope! Now he runs in his walker... Eats everything I eat... Points at things and people he recognizes... He has reactions and emotions... In fact he has a really bad temper already...!! 

Yup... My little baby is all grown up...

From last year to today.. I have lost all my fears (I'm a great mum!!!) but my excitement to see him grow and become a person of his own, has just doubled!! 


I mean seriously how tiny was he?!!! 


Still sleeps just as cutely!!! 

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